Why Do I Feel So Drained Around Some People? The Truth About Energy Vampires (And How to Reclaim Your Power)

By Dr. Neeti Kaushik

Have You Felt This Too?

Have you ever walked away from a conversation or a gathering feeling like something essential inside you has been taken? Like your energy has been siphoned out, even though you didn’t do anything physically tiring? Have you ever asked yourself, “Why do I feel so emotionally exhausted after spending time with certain people?”

Or worse, do you find yourself questioning your worth, your choices, or your joy after spending time with someone who just feels heavy?

If you’re nodding right now, I want you to pause, take a deep breath, and say this with me:

“It’s not always me. Sometimes, it’s the energy I’m absorbing.”

Sometimes, the people around us are not just triggering emotional reactions; they are feeding off our energy. These people are called energy vampires. And while they don’t have fangs or cloaks, their ability to drain your life force is very real.

A Personal Story from My Heart

Years ago, I had a friend—let’s call her “M.” She was charming, always had stories to tell, and had a way of making you feel like you were the only one who could help her. Every time we met, I’d listen to her emotional roller-coasters, console her after breakups, and offer practical advice.

But over time, I noticed a pattern.
I’d feel tired after our calls. Not just tired—completely drained, moody, even anxious. I stopped feeling excited about our interactions. My energy levels dropped, and I often found myself questioning my own life.

It took months for me to realize: I was not helping her heal. I was becoming her energetic fuel.
She was not a bad person. But she was feeding off my light. And I was letting her.

Who Are Energy Vampires?

“Energy vampires” is a metaphor for people who unconsciously (and sometimes consciously) siphon off your energy, leaving you feeling empty, depleted, and overwhelmed.

Unlike mythological vampires, they don’t bite your neck—but they do cling to your emotional bandwidth, occupy your mental space, and overstay their welcome in your aura.

They might be:

• The chronic complainer who never sees the silver lining
• The guilt-tripper who makes you feel bad for setting boundaries
• The drama magnet who always has a new crisis
• The manipulative flatterer who praises you to extract favors
• The emotional dumper who shares everything and never asks how you’re doing

Also read- Waking Up at 3 AM? It’s Not a Sign – It’s a Calling

How to Recognize You’ve Encountered an Energy Vampire

Let’s get specific. Here are some real-life situations that can help you identify energy vampires:

Scenario 1: The “Guilt Whisperer”

You finally decide to take a day off for self-care. A family member says,

“Oh, must be nice to have so much time for yourself. I wish I could do that…”
Now you’re spiraling in guilt.

What just happened?
They projected their inner dissatisfaction onto your joy. That’s a drain.

Scenario 2: The “Unending Crisis” Friend

Every conversation starts with:

“You won’t believe what happened now…”
And ends with:
“I just don’t know what to do. But anyway, thanks for listening.”

You gave advice. You gave time and You gave energy. And they gave…nothing.

Scenario 3: The “Charming Narcissist”

They love being admired. They talk endlessly about their accomplishments. But when you share your win, they either ignore it or subtly belittle it:

“Oh wow, you got 10K followers? That’s cute. My cousin hit 100K in two months.”

Notice the subtle put-down. Your high just got deflated.

Scenario 4: The “Passive-Aggressive Commentator”

You show up in a beautiful outfit, feeling radiant. Someone looks at you and says:

“You look so nice… Did you lose weight? You were starting to look a bit tired these days.”
Or,
“I love how confident you are wearing that.”

You smile politely, but their words sting later. They’ve disguised judgment as a compliment—a classic energy zap.

Scenario 5: The “Control Freak Mentor”

They offer help, advice, and support—but it always comes with strings. If you don’t do things their way, they withdraw emotionally or subtly shame you:

“I just wanted the best for you. I thought you trusted me.”

What feels like guidance is actually manipulation cloaked as concern.

Scenario 6: The “Boundary Pusher”

You set clear limits:

“I won’t be available after 8 PM.”
They call at 10 PM anyway and say:
“I just really needed you right now. You always say you’re spiritual, but where’s the compassion?”

They weaponize your kindness and spirituality to cross lines.

Scenario 7: The “Drama Distributor”

You get a call that starts with:

“Don’t tell anyone, but I need to tell you something shocking…”
They thrive on secrets, gossip, and chaos. You didn’t ask for it—but now your brain is holding emotional baggage that isn’t even yours.

Energetic dumping is real—and it stains your peace.

A Simple Test: The “Afterglow” or the “Afterburn”

After meeting someone, ask yourself:

• Do I feel uplifted, lighter, calm?
• Or do I feel heavy, anxious, irritated, confused?

Your energy never lies.
Tune in. Trust it. And act on it.

Symptoms of Energy Drain

• Sudden fatigue or exhaustion after interaction
• Mood swings or anxiety without a clear reason
• Feeling “off” or disconnected from your inner self
• Overthinking or guilt after conversations
• A strong desire to avoid certain people

Your body and spirit are always speaking. Pay attention to what they’re telling you.

Why You Might Be Attracting Energy Vampires

Empaths, sensitive souls, caregivers, and lightworkers—people like you and me—often carry a deep desire to help, fix, and heal.
We attract those who need healing… but sometimes, we attract those who feed.

If you were raised to:

• Seek approval
• Avoid conflict
• Over-give to receive love
• Silence your needs for others’ comfort

Then you’re more likely to tolerate energy vampires—even love them—because your nervous system is wired for “overfunctioning.”

But remember:

Your light is meant to inspire, not to be siphoned.

What to Do: Setting Boundaries and Protecting Your Energy

1. Awareness is Everything

Start paying attention to how you feel after interactions. Keep a small “Energy Journal.” Note:

• Who energizes me?
• Who depletes me?
• What’s the emotional residue after our conversation?

2. Practice Sacred No

A “No” said with clarity is more loving than a “Yes” said with resentment.
Say:

“I understand you’re going through something, but I don’t have the bandwidth right now.”
“Let’s talk when I’m in a better headspace.”

3. Use Visualization Techniques

Before meeting people who drain you, visualize:

• A shield of white or golden light around you
• Mirror walls reflecting their energy back
• A cord cutting ritual afterward to detach from their emotional threads

4. Cleanse Your Aura Daily

Energy hygiene is as important as physical hygiene.

• Use sage, palo santo, or organic dhuni
• Take salt baths to dissolve auric residue
• Use singing bowls or binaural frequencies to rebalance your energy field

5. Wear and Work With Protective Crystals

These crystals are like your energetic bouncers:

Crystal	Purpose	How to Use
Black Tourmaline	Blocks psychic attacks, absorbs negativity	Keep at entry points or wear as pendant or bracelet
Labradorite	Protects aura, great for empaths	Wear as bracelet during social events
Smoky Quartz	Grounds scattered energy	Meditate with it after draining interactions
Amethyst	Enhances spiritual awareness, calms the mind	Keep under your pillow for energetic detox
Hematite	Shields you from emotional manipulation	Carry in pocket during tough conversations

Tip: Cleanse your crystals regularly with incense, sage, palo santo, or organic dhuni.

A Final Reflection: Don’t Abandon Yourself

In the past, I would stay in draining relationships because I didn’t want to “hurt” the other person. I thought compassion meant endurance. But I’ve learned that:

True compassion begins with self-compassion.
Protecting your peace is not betrayal. It’s self-respect.

A Gentle Reminder from Dr. Neeti

You are not weak for feeling deeply.
You are not selfish for stepping away.
U are wise, intuitive, and worthy of protecting your light.

If someone makes you question your joy, your worth, your intuition—it’s time to walk away lovingly, but firmly.

Trust your vibes more than their words.

Did this resonate with you?
Have you encountered energy vampires in your life?
Share your experience below.

With love and light,
Dr. Neeti Kaushik