We all tell lies to ourselves. Now, you may ask, “Mam, yes, we tell lies to others, but to ourselves?” Yes, we do. Today, I, Dr Neeti Kaushik want to share the life lessons I’ve learned from the lies I told myself over the years. These lies led to significant changes in my life, and I hope my journey resonates with you and offers some valuable insights. Here are six lies I told myself, and I’m sure at least three to four of them will resonate with you. These life lessons will surely help you in your journey.
1. My Dreams Are Impossible
Whenever I used to dream big, I would often say, “Big talk for big people. My dreams can’t come true.” I always told my son, “Beta, we are middle-class people; your maternal grand father and paternal grandfather both are service class people, and we are not used to take big risks. “
I had a fear of change because I was comfortable with having a good monthly salary in my account. Thinking that with big dreams come big risks created financial insecurity and fear in me. I thought my fear was bigger than my dreams. But the truth is, your dreams should be bigger than your fears.
I always wanted to do something different, but I never imagined that one day, after 35 years of experience in school administration, I would wake up and decide to quit my career to follow my passion. It took me many years to realize this, but I want to tell you not to be afraid to follow your dreams and passions. Don’t let fear hold you back because, as the saying goes, “Beyond fear lies victory.”
When I started my YouTube channel in November 2020, I faced numerous challenges. However, maintaining consistency in my actions paid off. Today, almost three and a half years later, I see the results of my persistent efforts. Success doesn’t happen overnight; it’s the result of continuous effort and dedication. By taking small, consistent actions every day, you can achieve your goals and make a significant impact in your life and the lives of others.
In moments of doubt, Carnelian crystals can help. Known as the stone of motivation, Carnelian empowers you to overcome obstacles and instills the courage needed to pursue your dreams. This crystal boosts your confidence and brings clarity to your goals.
2. I Am Stuck with People Who Hurt Me
I used to tell myself, “I’ve done so much good for my family and friends, but why do they hurt me?” I felt stuck with such people. It took me a long time to realize that my mind was trapping me in a victim mentality.
Whenever someone called or met me and asked how I was, instead of saying I was good, I would complain about how things weren’t going well, how someone disobeyed me, and why they weren’t listening to me. I focused on the negatives instead of the positives in life without realizing that I was looking for support for my thoughts.
Changing this mindset transformed my aura, energy, and perspective. It’s not easy, but believe me, it’s not impossible either. Focusing on the good can change your entire outlook on life. Surrounding yourself with positive, supportive people and distancing yourself from those who bring negativity is crucial for your mental and emotional well-being.
I also learned the importance of setting boundaries and standing up for myself. It’s okay to distance yourself from toxic relationships and focus on those who genuinely care about you and uplift you. This shift in mindset and relationships significantly improved my overall happiness and sense of fulfillment.
3. Things Will Never Get Better
We often think our conditions are the worst and that they will never improve. During COVID, when there was chaos everywhere, I told myself, “What’s the use of being scared? If I have to get COVID, I will. Fear won’t help.”
We need to learn from adversity. A good example is a caterpillar in a cocoon, seeing only darkness but eventually transforming into a butterfly. Until we face our challenges, we remain in a victim mentality. Embrace challenges as opportunities for growth.
I faced many personal and professional challenges during the pandemic, from health concerns to adapting to new ways of working. However, I learned that adversity often brings out the best in us. It forces us to innovate, adapt, and grow in ways we never thought possible.
By focusing on the lessons learned from each challenge, I was able to transform my mindset and approach problems with a more positive outlook. Adversity is not a barrier; it’s a stepping stone to becoming stronger and more resilient.
During tough times, Labradorite can help. Known for its transformative properties, Labradorite aids in navigating through challenges and finding light in the darkness. This crystal encourages perseverance, sparks creativity, and provides the strength to see beyond current hardships.
4. My Failed Relationships Were a Waste of Time
Relationships can mean any connection with your family, friends, or extended family. I used to think that failed relationships were a waste of time. I would put in my best effort to maintain these relationships, but if I didn’t see positive changes, I would get upset and curse myself for wasting time and efforts in mending that relationship. However, through learning self-love and engaging in self-love activities, I realized that some people come into our lives just to teach us a few lessons. If we don’t learn those lessons, they will be repeated, possibly through another person, until we understand it.
In my self-love activities, I created three columns: what I gained or learned from this person or relationship, what harm it caused to my mental peace, and whether that relationship was worthy of taking care . This exercise helped me evaluate the true value of my relationships.
Understanding this made me realize that not everyone fits into my life, and this clarity helped me know what I truly want. Relationships, whether they succeed or fail, are part of our growth and learning. They are not a waste of time; some will nurture you through love and care, while others will make you strong through tough lessons.
I also learned the importance of self-love through Kunzite crystal and Rhodonite crystal. It’s essential to value yourself and not settle for anything less than you deserve. By recognizing your worth, you can attract and maintain relationships that bring joy, support, and mutual growth.
5. Great Things Will Come with help from a dear one
I always thought that what I wanted in life would come to me through someone else. If I wanted to go shopping, someone would take me; if I wanted to watch a movie, someone would show it to me. I had given the key to my happiness to others. Don’t do that.
For instance, I decided to create my own channel. It was my dream, so I had to work for it. Relying on others for happiness is wrong. You have to take control of your own dreams and work towards them.
Taking responsibility for my happiness and success was a game-changer. I realized that I had the power to create the life I wanted. By setting goals, making plans, and taking action, I was able to achieve things I once thought were impossible.
This shift in mindset also taught me the value of hard work and determination. Nothing worth having comes easy, but the effort you put in will always be worth it. Trust yourself and your abilities, and don’t wait for others to make your dreams come true.
For those on a journey of self-love, consider joining my Self-Love Course. It’s designed to help you reclaim your happiness, build confidence, and empower yourself to achieve your dreams. Invest in yourself and take the first step towards a more fulfilling life.
6. I Am Not Ready Because I Am Not Good Enough
One crucial lie I used to tell myself was, “I am not ready because I am not good enough.” This lie held me back from pursuing many opportunities. I learned that you will never be 100% ready in life. The key is to start anyway and improve as you go along.
I used to think that I needed to be fully prepared and perfect before I could take on new challenges. Whether it was starting a new project, giving a presentation, or launching a workshop, I always felt I wasn’t ready. This mindset prevented me from growing and seizing opportunities.
Through experience, I realized that perfection is an illusion. You don’t need to be perfect to start; you just need to begin. Taking that first step, even if you feel unprepared, is essential for growth. You learn and improve along the way. Each step you take builds confidence and skills.
Reflecting on these lies and breaking free from them has brought me to where I am today. I hope sharing these lessons helps you recognize and overcome the lies you might be telling yourself. Remember, the journey to self-awareness and growth starts with honesty and courage. Embrace your dreams, take consistent actions, surround yourself with positivity, learn from adversity, value your relationships, and take control of your happiness. You have the power to transform your life. For more information visit my YouTube channel- “ Nitty Gritty With Dr Neeti Kaushik”
Gauri Virkar
Going through a very scared relationship..this article is very motivational…gave me strength to fightback..will surely follow ur guidance Ma’am ..
Neeti Kaushik
All the best
Gudipati Sridevi
I am so happy to come accross the Article. You always enlighten the life with simple and beautiful way. I would love to know your crystal journey, how the crystals came into your life and how you learned so much about crystals.
Great Ful 🙏
Neeti Kaushik
Thank you for the great suggestion. will write an article on this soon
Sungeeta
Vry vry good 💯 worthy knowledge……m bhi kuch esae hi dorr se guzar rhi hun
Neeti Kaushik
All the best
Moon child
So I am a student and I urgently need to know what I aspire for to make quick decision as I am not left with a lot of time to make this decision. The worst thing is When you don’t know yourself, this feel gets even worst when you’re peers and people around you have already taken the same decision which makes you anxious. I think lack clarity and I am in a dilemmatic state for about 2 to 3 months. Please consult What should I do?
Neeti Kaushik
It’s understandable to feel anxious when you’re facing a time-sensitive decision and lack clarity about your aspirations. It can be particularly challenging when those around you seem to have their paths figured out. To gain clarity, try reflecting on what activities or subjects genuinely interest you and what values are most important to you. Consider talking to a mentor or counselor who can help you explore your strengths and passions. Additionally, meditation can be a powerful tool to connect with your higher self and gain deeper insights. Using an Azurite crystal can also aid in clearing mental confusion and enhancing clarity. Sometimes, writing down your thoughts or discussing them with someone can help in sorting through your feelings. Remember, it’s okay to take your time to find what truly resonates with you.
Amit
Thanks for your information
Kamlesh Desai
Many of the points above are true with me too. Nice article
Neeti Kaushik
Thank you
Aditi Bhatt
Mam aapane jo bhi baten Kahi vah Sab 100% Sach Hai… jab tak Maine aapka self love wala course nahin kiya tha tab tak main bhi Yahi samajhti Thi Ki Koi Meri Tarif kar de, koi Mujhe Ghuma lae ,..Koi Mujhe movie dikha de …Koi Mujhe Phool gift kar de ..koi Mujhe gift Kar De De but yeah aap ka jo self love course Kiya Maine Uske bad Meri Aankhen Khuli Ki nobody cares for u.. i mean Kisi Ko Fark Nahin Padta.. Jab Main Dekhti Thi Ki Koi Mujhe gift Nahin Deta Hai Koi …mujhe yaad hi nhi ki mere husband Aaj Tak Kabhi Mere Sath Kahin shopping karne ke liye Nahin Gaye matlab Mujhe Yad hi Nahin Hai Ki vah Main Ek sath shopping ke liye Gaye Honge to Jab Main Dekhti Thi aaspaas Ke Logon Ko ki husband wife sath mein Jaate Hain aur husband wife ki help Karte Hain unhen Jo chahie hota hai shopping Mein Sadi suit dresses but aapka self love course karne ke bad mujhe apne aap se bahut pyar ho gaya hai …matlab pahle Mujhe Jahan hurt feel Hota tha Ab Main Fark Nahin Padta thank you so much mam Pehle accept karti thi ro dho Kar Ke but abhi mujhe koi Expectations hi nahi bache… aapse judkar Maine life mein bahut Kuchh Sikha Hai I mean Wohi baat hai na ki yah Jindagi kam pad Jayegi Khud galtiyan Karke sikhane se to isiliye Kaha Gaya Hai Ki books Hamari sabse acchi dost Hote Hain… Iske alava main yah Kahana chahti Hun Ki Baki Jo Hamare आस-पास log Hain unke experience bhi Hamare kaam Mein Aate Hain.. aapke self love course Ne Meri Life 360 to Nahin but ya 180 degree to change kar diya… thank u so Mach mam aapka… ab main sirf mere jaisa Banna chahti hun … Mein pahle confidence nahin tha matlab main bahut Shy person Hu main bahut introvert hun Logon Ke Samne bol Nahin sakti but recently maine groups me videos create krke upload krna start Kiya h….youtube pr bhi start krne ke liye learn kr rhi hu apni knowledge, lifelessons….
Neeti Kaushik
Thank you so much itna bda message likhne ke liye, and i am happy ki aap apni life me positive changes la rhi hai. All the very best.
Puja Pandey
Thankyou Thankyou Thankyou ❤️😊 ma’am I love you so much…… you really helped me alot!!!!!! I am happily blessed 🙌
Neeti Kaushik
You are very very welcome ❤️
Love u
Sophia
The best part is I would like to tell you neeti mam is whenever I am going through something let it be High or lows in my life and I don’t know coincidentally or accidentally your message pops up and gives me the right message that I should follow. Thankyou very much mam it inspires me and helps me take the right action at proper times and absolutely right at all times at least I’m my case. Luv you Mam.
Neeti Kaushik
That means the Universe and your angels are helping you. God bless you
Mrs. Shashi madaye
This reason are resonate with me and consistent taking steps for my self growth
Mam u r my best Guru l, guide and best Friend ❤️
Love u
Neeti Kaushik
All the very best. God bless you
Mrs. Shashi madaye
Mam u r my best Guru l, guide and best Friend ❤️
Love u
Neeti Kaushik
aww, love you too ❤️
Rituparna Singh
I can relate to your experiences so much Ma’am ! I have already started to ignore the negatives and trying to focus on the positivity around me.. your articles are always encouraging. Thank you!
Neeti Kaushik
All the best
Neelima Agarwal
Very inspiring… I follow you on Instagram, your way of explaining with day to day examples is very good & one gets the message.. thank you 🙏
Neeti Kaushik
glad you liked it
Vandana
It helped a lot, I felt good after reading this article. Best wishes
Neeti Kaushik
❤️
Nisreen Mustafa Mamajiwala
Ma’am you are my Inspiration, mane jabse apko follow karna start kiya hai mane bhaut kuch shika hai ake chanel se ab mai jine lagi hun, thanks a lot ma’am love you, live long life🌹.
Neeti Kaushik
Thank you too. God bless you
Mala Krish
What a beautiful explanation of the different assumptions that we have about life. You are so true and transparent mam. Thank you for sharing such wonndeful insights.
I can resonate with all your points. Specially the relationship one. Close people are the ones who trigger your emotions and feelings.
For me personally I need to work on self love and self loved activities and keep myself more positive and letting go of whatever criticism comes your way and say this is not me.
Thank you
Neeti Kaushik
Most welcome. sending you lots of love
Roopa
Very nicely wrote mam, very glad I connected with you emotionally.
Neeti Kaushik
❤️
How I Turned My Passion into Purpose—and Why You Should Too - Dr. Neeti Kaushik
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